Orange: (singing) Banana bana bobana, fee, fi, fo fana, I really hate...bananas! (laughs)
Crabapple: (Offscreen) That totally sucked!
Orange: Whoa! Who said that?
Crabapple: Don't quit your day job, buddy.
Orange: I don't have a job.
Crabapple: Well, that's a shocker.
Orange: Are you my conscience?
Orange: Talking grasshopper?
Orange: Oh. Well where are you?
Crabapple: Hello, McFly! Right here! Right in front of you.
Crabapple: Oh, come on! What are you, tone-deaf and blind?
Orange: Whoa! It's a midget apple!
Crabapple: No, no, no. I'm a crabapple. That's a midget apple.
Midget Apple: We prefer the term "Little Apple", thank you very much.
Orange: Wait, wait, wait, wait, so, you're a crabapple? I thought that was a crabapple.
(an apple screams)
Crab: Yee ha! Ride em' cowboy! Woo ha!
Crabapple: Does that sort of thing happen a lot around here?
Orange: Nah, I think it's just a spur-of-the-moment thing. (laughing and then stops)
Crabapple: Are you finished?!
Orange: No, I'm an orange! (laughs)
Crabapple: (mockingly laughs) Shut up! Cripes, I'm starting to miss the singing.
Orange: Oh, really?
Crabapple: No, no, none of this is good. I'm stuck with an Orange that runs his mouth like a wheat-eater on rocket fuel, a crab that thinks he's a cowboy, and a freakin' Midget Apple!
Midget Apple: That's Little Apple!
Crabapple: Nobody cares!
Orange: Hey, hey, Crabapple!
Crabapple: Shut it.
Crabapple: Be quiet!
Crabapple: SHUT UP!!!!!
(silence for about 4 seconds)
Orange: Want to hear about the time I met a pumpkin?
Orange: Geez, you are an apple.
Orange: Yeah, no kidding.
Crabapple: No kidding?! That's all you've been doing since I got here! No kidding would be great! You should get to work on that right away, you FREAKIN' IDIOT!!!!!
Orange: Okay. So I said, "Pumpkin? More like Plumpkin!" (laughs)
Crabapple: Dimple face..... dimwitted pile of......
Orange: Get it? 'Cause he's a pumpkin, and he's plump. Plumpkin? (laughs)
Crabapple: It's not funny, it's--
Crabapple: No, it's--
(shadow casts on Crabapple)
Crabapple: Hey, what happened to the lights?
Crabapple: Plumpkin?! (scream and gets crushed)
Orange: Ow! Hey, how's it going, Plumpkin?
Pumpkin: I think I just sat on a midget apple!
Midget Apple: Hey! It's Little Apple!
Orange: Hey, hey, Plumpkin!
Midget Apple: (screams)
Crab: Yee ha! Ride 'em cowboy!