Orange: (As Dane Boedigheimer carries him out of the cooler and puts him on a picnic table) Hey, get me out of here! Whoa! Watch it, Mr. Grabbypants! I don't like being carried around like that. Geez.
(Football gets placed on a stand)
Football: Whoa! Whoa.
Football: Hi there!
Orange: What the heck are you?
Football: Me? I'm a football.
Orange: You're a ball made of feet?
Football: No, no, no. Foot-ball. Get it? Not made of feet!
(Soccer Ball is kicked onto the field)
Soccer Ball: Whoa!
Orange: Whoa! It's a melon!
Soccer Ball: I'm not a melon. I'm a football!
Football: Oh, no you're not! Not in America, buddy!
(Soccer Ball yells as he gets kicked away)
Football: Freakin' tourists!
Orange: Is Melon made of feet, too?
Football: No! Nobody's made of feet! Boy, what's wrong with you?
Orange: I'm an orange!
Football: Yeah. News flash. Thanks.
Orange: Your face is full of laces. Somebody didn't take their shoes off! (Laughs)
Football: Hey! Do you even know what a football is?
Orange: Yeah, it's a ball made of feet.
Football: No! Football is a game that picks two worthy opponents against each other in an arena made of violence and grace. It's the only true...
Orange: You look like a mutated lemon! You're a lemonhead! (Laughs)
Football: Yo, That's not even funny! I'm shaped like this so it's easier to throw me!
Orange: Wait. Throw you? With their hands?
Orange: So why are you called a football then? You should be called a handball!
Football: (Scoffs) No.
Orange: You're a handball!
Football: That's not my name.
Orange: Hey! Hey, Handball!
Football: It's Football!
Orange: Hey, Handball! Do you have any money?
Orange: 'Cause I want my "quarterback!" (Laughs)
Football: All right. This is getting a little too-
Orange: Your name is Handball Lemonhead! (laughs)
Football: That's not my name!
Orange: Hey! Hey, Handball! Can you blow bubbles with your spit?
Orange: Like this. Watch! (Attempts to blow bubbles with his spit)
Football: That's disgusting.
Orange: (Continues to blow bubbles with his spit) Try it! (Continues)
Orange: (Continues) You're not trying! (Continues)
Football: Yeah! And I'm not going to!
Football: Stop that!
Orange: (Continues) You'll love it! (Continues)
Football: No, I'm pretty sure I won't love it!
Orange: (Continues) It's fun! (Stops)
Football: NO! What's going on here? I'm the star of the Super Bowl and this is how I get treated? Being berated by a talking orange?
Orange: Super Bowl? Is that for a really big salad? (Laughs)
Football: No! It's not for a really big salad! Are you actually that slow?
Orange: Hey! Hey, Handball!
Football: What? (A football player runs up and kicks him)
(Football screams as he sails through the air)
Orange: Hey Handball, can I have your seat?!
(Football hits the touchdown pole)
Orange: (Sighs) Oh, well.
(Soccer Ball rolls up next to him)
Soccer Ball: Whoa! I tell you, I'm a bloody football, not him!
Orange: Yeah, right. Handball told me that you weren't made of feet. Stupid melon.
Fruity Question of the Day
How many apples can you fit in your mouth at one time?